My view of...

...La Leche League. Every once in a while, I hear the stereotypical comment about moms involved with La Leche League (LLL). That is, "they are crazy (or fanatical, weird, hippies, etc.)" Sigh. Well, usually, the comment is out of the speaker's mouth before he or she realizes I am a La Leche League Leader. I don't really know whether my involvement is confirmation or contradiction of the stated opinion. However, I don't usually get a chance to give my own feelings about the organization, so I'm taking the opportunity now. Aah, the beauty of having one's own blog...

Anyway, there are definitely folks in the group who are out of the mainstream on a variety of levels. There are homeschoolers, vegans, and cloth-diaperers. There are liberals, conservatives, devoutly religious, atheists. Some are brand new to parenthood and others are mothers of 7 plus children. The string that ties the group together is breastfeeding. The reason the organization has been so successful in promoting this womanly art is that they stick to the topic. Anyone is welcome. Even though the founders were Catholics who met at a church picnic, mothers of all backgrounds have always been invited. Leaders are trained to steer discussion away from outside topics at meetings, so people with all kinds of beliefs can attend and feel comfortable.

And, hand in hand with breastfeeding, is the promotion of full-time motherhood. I know of very few other places a mother can go where she will have her position as the full-time caretaker of her children applauded. Working mothers are also welcome, and many groups offer evening meetings to accomodate those who are unavailable during the day. It's possible to work and breastfeed, it's just a lot harder. I know some moms really do have to work. And more power to those who are determined to work and breastfeed. However, leaders must be committed to staying home with their children.

American culture isn't really breastfeeding-friendly. Sure, there are plenty of advertisements (including formula ads) that give lip service to the importance of breastfeeding (I love the Enfamil bags passed out in hospitals with tags that read, "breastfeeding support kit"). But mother-baby togetherness is frowned upon. Let's be honest. Moms get pressure to leave their babies for work, for a night out, or even a vacation away from the child. When Lucy was 4 months old we were house-hunting in Pittsburgh. We were with a realtor and had to stop periodically so I could nurse the baby. I got the oh-so-helpful suggestion that I should leave the baby in the hotel with Grandma the next day. I explained that she was breastfed (I'm not sure why she hadn't figured that out by that point) and got the "can't you just give her a bottle? don't you know that formula is just as good these days" response.

So, moms try to nurse around these obstacles. They try to nurse in patterns based on formula feeding (you know, the 15 minutes per side, every 2-3 hours appproach). Then they wonder why they have supply issues and fussy babies. Moms are meant to get to know their children so they can feed them when they're hungry, not according to a pre-determined schedule.

In LLL, a mom can learn to trust her instincts, appreciate her body, and appreciate motherhood as a valuable position in its own right. There's nothing else quite like it.

I have really valued my participation in this beautiful organization. But, today I was disappointed. I got my new edition of New Beginnings Magazine, which is published by LLL. As I mentioned, the group is all-inclusive and focused on a single mission which is promoting breastfeeding around the world. The magazine is full of letters from mothers sharing their experiences and giving their support to other moms. This month included a 2-mom family. And a picture of the 2-mom family. I am not suggesting that a mother in an alternative relationship should be excluded from the support of the group if she should choose to breastfeed. I'm just disappointed because I always leave these magazines lying around the house, and my children can look at them if they so choose. I'm annoyed because now I have to either explain the situation to my 6-year-old or hide the magazine. I don't think she should be forced to learn about these things right now.

If LLL is really all-inclusive, shouldn't they consider those of us who are trying to teach our children that God intended families to begin with a mom and a dad?

Yes, all mothers are welcome. And, all mothers are welcome to contribute to the magazine. But, did the publishers really need to include the family picture? Are we really single-minded, or is there another agenda here? I don't know. But the publishers could have waived the PC-inclination for the benefit of those who might find it unacceptable for family consumption. And they didn't. I'm disappointed. And I don't know if I can continue to associate myself with a league that is so careless. Or careful. Am I making too much of this?